The couple was determined to have a closed adoption and they had been waiting for quite a while. That weekend they received a call that seemed perfect, except for one big thing, the mother wanted a semi-open adoption. The couple passed with a determination that baffled their caseworker.
A few days later the caseworker and I had a conversation about the situation and the couple and I wish I could’ve done something but it was too late. It seems that, had the couple asked, the young woman had only asked for one letter and a picture each year! When asked later the couple, lamenting now, said, “We could’ve done that!”
I see this happen often and it is something that I discuss with my clients often. There are a million interpretations of semi-open adoption. Before turning away from a possible situation always ask what the definition to this mom is!
As a side note, and something you should consider, it is just a fact of life that in the day and age we live in closed adoptions are becoming almost obsolete. With the internet access, social media and support groups, just about anyone can be found. You may want to evaluate how that plays into your adoption plans…something we will be discussing more in depth at a later date.